ht_murray: little girl, cheeks, blue rose (Default)
Today is exactly one month since my mom passed away.

One month and one day ago, I was only thinking as far ahead as August. I was training for a half marathon in Madison, Wisconsin, planning to spend a week or so up there visiting with family, run the race, and coming back to Texas. A month and a day ago, I kinda figured Texas was home and was gonna stay that way.

But in the last month, everything changed. I'm not running the half in August anymore, which is good, because my training went totally to pot for about a week and a half. I'm just now getting back in the groove, but I am planning to run that race next year, along with my cousins and my aunt. We've even talked about doing Chicago next year as a family thing. And I've considered doing the Disney marathon in a year or so, and bringing my sister and her family along, because I'd love to be there the first time the kids see Disney World. Over the last month, not much has changed here, except everything has changed. This isn't home anymore, and after some good long talks with hubby, he finally agrees there's nothing down here for either of us that's as important as everything we have up there.

So, it's officially unofficial (won't be official until I actually quit my job next spring) that we're planning to move in the spring. As much as I'd like to just pick up and do it now, we're going to need a good while to get everything arranged. You don't just pick three horses up and move them across the country without a lot of hassle. And no way we're moving in the fall with a Wisconsin winter bearing down on us. So, spring it is.

And to drive the point home, the point of no return I guess, yesterday we bought a truck. We already have a truck, but not one I'd feel safe driving across the country in. So, now we have a new/used 2005 Dodge Ram 1500 sitting in our driveway, all shiny and new-looking. And it's paid for. You should've seen hubby's hand when he was writing the check. LOL. It's not the first indulgence I've allowed myself in the last month either. I also bought myself a new Viewsonic gTab, which isn't supposed to be all that great out of the box, but which, I'm told blows iPad2 out of the water once you root it and install a new ROM. For the price, I guess I can take a chance on bricking it, in which case I'll probably buy the Toshiba Thrive. Because hey, you can't take it with you. Well, in our case, you can, as long as it'll fit in the back of a Dodge pickup.

Big things coming down the pipe, and I suddenly don't feel like I'm treading water anymore. I wonder if I'm supposed to be sadder, shedding more tears, kicking myself over missed opportunities. I dunno. But I'm not doing any of those things. What I am doing is looking forward to something. That's more than I could've said 30 days ago. And it's all good, I think.

One thing I should've said 30 days ago that I didn't say nearly enough. I love you, Mom, and thank you for everything.


POV woes

Jun. 19th, 2011 11:01 am
ht_murray: little girl, cheeks, blue rose (Default)
Y'know, it's really no secret that I hate anything written in first person POV, but as I try to work through yet another m/m sex scene, I'm gaining an appreciation for why people seem to do it so often. I mean, having the option of a whole other pronoun set to keep from having to constantly plug in the names is becoming more and more appealing all the time. It's hard enough keeping the he, his, and hims straight in a two man scene. Try it with three.

*grumble, grumble*

Still don't think I could ever do 1st person, though. Why write something you don't like to read?
ht_murray: little girl, cheeks, blue rose (Default)
Just what the title says. I have a ton of docs open on my desktop, but my writing brain seems to be broken. All of them are long and complicated, unwieldy and just friggin' scary. I'm just flat out stuck. Plus I keep running circles in my head over whether or not to move back to Wisconsin. I have gone so far as to request money from my 401k and start looking for a more reliable vehicle that can actually, y'know, drive 1200 miles without breaking down in a smoking heap. In short, I'm kinda petrified, and I need distractions.

I know I've asked for prompts before and only a handful got written, but before I close out all the fic in this journal, I thought I might try to re-discover what it was like to write something for fun, just because.

So, as long as you won't be too disappointed if I don't write yours, I'm taking any and all prompts. J2, SPN, anything that doesn't specifically have to do with Seasons 5 or 6. I'm looking for comment fic or drabble length. Gen, slash, het, h/c, PWP, anything goes.

As soon as I post this, I'm going to bed, and then I'm going to sleep, and then I'm going to wake up, eat more than anyone my size should be able to put away, and probably sleep some more. So, nothing will happen before tomorrow, I don't think. But you never know.

Thanks for sticking with me while I flounder aimlessly about. *fishy lips and flopping about*

P.S. Post is not flocked, so anyone can prompt.
ht_murray: little girl, cheeks, blue rose (Default)
I said my last post about SPN was going to be my last post about SPN, but I didn't know the show was going to come up in casual conversation with relatives. It did. And I wasn't the one who brought it up. In case anyone cares what I gleaned from chatting with casual viewers of the show, I'll put it behind a cut.

Read more... )
ht_murray: little girl, cheeks, blue rose (Default)
Like the title says.

I saw the finales, mostly because I slept late, so when I got up, hubby was watching, and I couldn't make him turn it off or drag him out of the house like I usually do. :S This is not a reaction. This is my instant fix-it. Obviously contains SPOILERS for the last two eps of SPN.

My brain works in mysterious ways behind this cut. )

Also, a reminder that my previous post about where you can find me will stay open through tomorrow. *squishes to all*
ht_murray: little girl, cheeks, blue rose (Default)
I went for a five mile run this morning. (Okay, it turns out my five mile route was closer to six miles.) I haven't been down this particular road in awhile because I mostly run in the middle of the night, and it's just too dark and scary. Haha. I do enjoy a boost of adrenaline to make the run go faster, but not that much. I have to say, from what I saw this morning, it's probably a good thing I don't go down that road in the dark. Every time I rounded a corner there were buzzards in the road.

One dead pit bull. (Couldn't tell how it died, but it was a very short stretch of road and seems unlikely anyone would've been driving down it fast enough to hit the dog with their car, but it's not impossible.) One wild boar, but only the head. One snake, but only the head. Something that looked like a deer, only it could've been a calf, since all I could really see was one cloven hoof. The teeny tiniest turtle I've ever seen, squished. And the kicker? A whole stock tank full of carcasses. I have no idea what they were, since I didn't want to get any closer once I realized what it was. Either deer or calves, possibly hog carcasses, but I can't figure why anyone would kill that many animals if not for the meat. I wonder if someone's not reporting calves lost to coyote predation and just disposing of the calves themselves for the insurance money. Or, you know, could've been deer or something that they poisoned in order to kill coyotes. It was just... weird. At first I was like, wow, a stock tank on the side of the road. I wonder how you lose a stock tank on the side of the road. And then, I was like, why are there so many buzzards over here by the stock tank when the dead deer is over there on the other side of the road? And then,... yeah.

I'm not really grossed out by dead things. I guess I have a morbid curiosity, but no way I was digging around trying to figure out what was up with THAT. It's the nicest little stretch of road, too.

On a positive note, saw the cutest little black and white chihuahua playing, 'you can't catch me,' with a full grown collie. LOL. Chihuahuas. LOL.
ht_murray: little girl, cheeks, blue rose (Default)
I finished KyleXY on Netflix and was looking for another series. I caught an episode of Burn Notice when I was in LA and thought I liked the premise, so I added that to my queue. Unfortunately, Neflix does not have Burn Notice on streaming, only on DVD, so I had to dig up that copy of A Home at the End of the World they sent me awhile back and return it so they'd send me Burn Notice. I have to say, they got my return and sent out the next one within 24 hours of my mail carrier picking it up. That's pretty fast turn around.

I've only seen the first 3 episodes, since they only send one disc at a time. :/ but I am liking it so far. The lead hits a lot of my buttons. I see the discussion on SPN forums all the time about whether or not you'd watch The Dean Show or the Sam Show. I was always kinda on the fence. I mean, until this year I would've said I'd always watch Supernatural just as long as Dean was on it. Turns out that's really not enough, but I didn't have a good feel for what The Dean Show might be like until I saw Burn Notice. I think this is everything I love about Dean Winchester except he's not played by Jensen Ackles. That's a huge, very sad EXCEPT, but *shrug* I guess now we know I would watch the Dean show. LOL.

Also, in the realm of completely random, my butt hurts. I did a weird Spartan Race workout of the day yesterday. I ran out one mile (just under 10 minutes) until I was at the top this hill I like to run. It's a pretty steep hill on a quarter mile loop so you run up one side and down the other without having to turn around and go the other way. So, the workout was a mile warmup, 200 meters to the bottom of the hill, 50 walking lunges, sprint 200 meters to the top, slow jog to the bottom, 50 pushups, 200 meter sprint to the top, jog down, 100 squats (50 regular and 50 plie squats), sprint to the top, jog down, 30 burpees, and 1/2 mile cool down. Um, I do all of that stuff on a pretty regular basis, but never all in the same workout. My butt hates me today, and I think I slept 10 hours, but woohoo!
ht_murray: little girl, cheeks, blue rose (Default)
Seven scenes into the plotting of my story, I realize, "Hey, if you make the genius scientist your lead, you're gonna have to do a lot of research to explain what the hell he's doing."

Scrap seven scenes (or, you know, throw in somewhere else later) and make the Steampunk Pirate the lead, since he basically makes up everything as he goes anyway. LOL. 'ts okay, though, I really like the pirate better, anyway.

In other news, really enjoyed KyleXY, even though the lead is a total Marty Stu. I guess I really am a bad ficcer, *shrugs*. But I wouldn't recommend it if you want a show with resolution. Still, it hit all my D.A.R.Y.L. and Dark Angel hot buttons pretty well.

I would also highly recommend a movie called Saint Ralph which I dug up on Netflix. A feel good movie of the highest order, just enough funny and tear jerker moments to make it the kind of movie I'll watch over and over again. Also, another from Starz on Netflix is Teenage Dirtbag. A lot darker, not the best made, kinda bleak and ugly overall, but brought me to tears. The angst whores amongst us will love that one, methinks.

Would not recommend The Celestine Prophesy. Read the book. I was disappointed. I really wanted to be moved by the film, but I couldn't even watch it. I spent most of the time it was on, flipping to other tabs and back again. But it did sorta push me to look for more positive energy and to put out more positive energy. I really just need to admit that SPN sucks my energy and stop reading the discussions, because they make me think and feel things that I hate about myself. :/

Back to steampunk pirates. Also, LOL, was combing Etsy for Steampunk garb to put on my characters and realized why my story kept feeling like Final Fantasy X. Because Final Fantasy X is totally Steampunk. I just never knew the terminology. This would probably explain why I keep turning my hero into Yuna. :/ It's okay, though, because my love interest is totally a Rikku. LOL. But my guys are... guys.

That is all.
ht_murray: little girl, cheeks, blue rose (Default)
I dunno why I feel the urge to update. Just seems like the thing to do, even though I have nothing to report.

I joined a new running group. It starts next weekend. I'm pretty excited about it, but a little sad to leave my other group. But when I joined my first running group, it was the only one around, and the one I just joined is the one I had wished was in my city at the time but wasn't. I'm a little nervous about new people and whatnot, but I'll get over it. Plus they have swimming lessons. Yay! Of course, I don't own a suit, but I always wanted to learn how to swim with some kind of form so I could do it for exercise and not just fun.

I'm actually excited about writing something. Not exactly the gay pirate steampunk soul stealing angels thing, but on the same track. Not Sam and Dean or Jensen and Jared, though. But they will be starring in my mind.

I've started seeing coyotes while I'm running at 2 a.m. They usually run away. I'm more worried about deer and wild hogs.

Of course, now there are June bugs, which are the worst thing to run into ever.

I just looked out my window a few days ago and said, "the trees are starting to bud out." Today I looked out, and the world is fully shaded again. I think I would've been able to hear the leaves sprouting if I'd sat out on my porch and listened.

Oh, and girlie TMI behind the cut for the curious. )
ht_murray: little girl, cheeks, blue rose (Default)
Watching KyleXY now.

So far, there's Cory Monteith, who was in Wendigo, I think.

Guy Bee directed an episode in Season One.

Season 2 Episode 7 is called "Free to Be You and Me."

And Martin Cummins aka Ames White in Dark Angel (coincidentally the other half of the Alec/Ames pairing fic I just read after not having read long fic in ages) was in several episodes.

And not so much a Jensen connection, but even though the music in Kyle XY mostly sucks, they just played a song that was also in Bones and that I have in my Bones soundtrack folder.

Now I'm reminded of Latter Days, about all the things that look like random dots up close but make a bigger picture when you step away.

Gay Steampunk Angel Soul Pirates... yeah.
ht_murray: little girl, cheeks, blue rose (Default)
Steampunk angel soul pirates.

I wonder if it can be done.

I wonder if it has already been done.

Why does it remind me of Final Fantasy X? Nooooooo!

Okay, gay steampunk angel soul pirates.

That's better.
ht_murray: little girl, cheeks, blue rose (Default)
I have now watched over 4 seasons of Bones, and this is the first episode that made me cry.

Y'know what I think is so great about this show? It's a show about death as a means of affirming life. I think that's why the music moves me so much. I guess this episode being about youth and lost potential and music just hit my breaking point.

Now, I would love to read J2 AU in which Jensen's an Amish boy who left his faith to play piano. :/ I wouldn't write it myself, though. I always feel weird addressing other people's religions, like I won't do it fairly, but I did grow up in an area that was heavily populated by Amish, and this episode rang pretty true for me.

On a completely random note, whoever dresses Brennan needs to find her some tops that actually fit. I can't get past how many times she's been wearing a blouse that's pulled so tight across her chest that it looks like the button will come off. She's way too smart to dress herself like that. It just looks unkempt.

ETA: LOL, H-50 wasn't the first show to do the body in the Luau pit, I guess. Mmmm. And add Amy Gumenick to the list of SPN alum I've spied on Bones.


Mar. 8th, 2011 12:36 am
ht_murray: little girl, cheeks, blue rose (Default)
I'm not sure what steampunk is, but I've seen enough really awesome jewelry on Etsy to want to find out. Who knew I had a thing for old watch parts?

Also, I think I'm addicted to white eyeliner. I think it has something to do with my doll collecting days and big dewy doll eyes. I really am a freak.

Not as freaky as this, though. LOL. (It's a doll, and she's not nude.)
ht_murray: little girl, cheeks, blue rose (Default)
I realize it's the middle of the night here, but I'm awake. I've been meaning to post this for a couple of days, and now no one will probably be around to answer, but I'm gonna post it now, anyway.

So, Zack Addy... on Bones... he's not going to end up being Gorgomon or Gorgomon's apprentice is he?

I only ask because... very old spoilers for Season 2 Bones back here )

Also, I just have to laugh because he still had the crew cut in one epi, and in the next his old hair was back. Yay writer's strike, I guess.
ht_murray: little girl, cheeks, blue rose (Default)
Still watching Bones, almost through season 2.

According to Gordon Gordon, Brennan didn't sail off with Sully because she's 'incapable of leading a purposeless life,' at this stage. Consensus seems to be that she should've gone. It would've been good for her.

I find it ironic, because I can't honestly remember the last time I had a purpose. Is that good for me?

Also, thanks to everyone who replied to my question about Zack. I'm waiting to reply until I actually see what happens to him, but I get the feeling I won't like it.

The music on this show is really awesome as well. Does anyone know if there's a place where I can get it? I haven't searched iTunes, which seems to have everything of that nature, because nothing I buy on iTunes plays on my .mp3 player. I hate iTunes. So, anyplace other than iTunes?

A lot of SPN alum on Bones, too. Although, I think most of them were on Bones first. I only recognize them because of SPN, though. So far, Rachel Miner, Aldis Hodge, Fred Lehne, and now, A.J. Buckley. Ah, to be a secondary character actor in Hollywood.

*goes back to marathoning Bones and having no purpose.*

PS, thanks [ profile] vanae for the headphones. Music is sometimes the only thing that still gets to me. *hugs*

OHHHH, and does anyone know about the [ profile] spn_mardigras? I used to be flattered to be invited to join communities, but lately I've been getting a lot of random invites that just feel like spam. Who is running this comm, and what makes him/her think I know the first thing about Mardi Gras? And where did he/she get my name, because it seems like most of my friends know that I'm not really writing spn fic anymore? If this is one of my friends, then I apologize, but I haven't seen this pimped anywhere on my flist, so I am admittedly skeptical. I sometimes wonder if LJ is selling userinfo like spam mailers sell mailing lists, because I seem to get the most random things through here anymore. That's not even counting all the random spam comments on old fic that have been pouring in over the last couple days. I just do not get it.

Final ETA: Here's a Bones soundtrack on Amazon. It does have some of the best songs, but there are still some I wish were on there that aren't, and I don't know why they need two versions of the theme song on it.
ht_murray: little girl, cheeks, blue rose (Default)
Sorry for being spammy.

I'm watching Bones on Netflix. I'm about halfway through Season one. Now, I've seen most of the current season, and a few random episodes on cable, but since I'm watching Season One, I'm noticing the character of Zack, Brennan's assistant. I like that kid, but I'm pretty sure he's not in the current episodes. Anyone who's up on Bones canon know what happened to Zack? I'm guessing he probably transferred somewhere else once he finished his PhD's, but if something bad happens to him, I want to brace myself. LOL.


Feb. 26th, 2011 10:35 pm
ht_murray: little girl, cheeks, blue rose (Default)
At the top of my homepage, Jared Padalecki is trending as a top search next to Warren Buffet, The Oscars, and Free Tax Prep.

Did he do something I should know about? *ponders*
ht_murray: little girl, cheeks, blue rose (Default)
Huh. I watched Keith on Netflix the other night. I don't remember why it was in my queue. I think I suspected Keith would turn out to be gay. Or maybe it was because of Elizabeth Harnois (who was lovely in this, BTW.) But even though I saw Jennifer Grey in the opening credits, I watched almost the entire movie before I realized she played the mother. I think she's lovely, but I agree that she's hardly recognizable anymore. I don't know if that's good for her or bad.

/random observation

Oh, and Keith was a good movie, considering I'd never even heard of it. I'd rec it.


Feb. 18th, 2011 07:33 am
ht_murray: little girl, cheeks, blue rose (Default)
First, I need to thank [ profile] gatorgrrrl for the box of chocolates and [ profile] layne67 for the cute and cuddly gopher. I'm always a little bit mystified at the amount of cuteness that manages to end up on my profile page despite the fact that I hardly post anymore. *hugs*

And I wish I had a Con report to post, but I haven't written it yet for the same reason that I haven't replied to comments on the picture post. I seem to have picked up a flu bug on the way back from California and have been flat out on my couch for the last 48 hours. I have to work tonight, so I'm hobbling around this morning just to see if I actually can, but nothing involving thinking or creativity has transpired inside my brain since Tuesday. Sorry for that. I do have a report started.

I would like to share one little teaser, though.

As you might know, the Friday night concert at the con was, once again, the Brian Buckley Band, which has gotten mixed reviews. I'm not going to make any judgment on them since I haven't heard them, but I do get the feeling people only went to that in order to see Jared and Genevieve. I guess that's as good a reason as any.

A few of us used the opportunity to get away from the hotel and venture out into Hollywood. Louden Swain was playing at the Viper Room. For those of you who don't know, (which is probably only me until last week, LOL) Louden Swain is Rob Benedict (aka the Prophet Chuck) and his band. They posted on their website that they'd be playing the Viper Room on Friday, so a few of us made the trip. I had never heard Louden Swain and wasn't sure I'd like them, but hey, it was a chance to see the Viper Room. As it turns out, the Viper Room is just a really small room painted black with a mirrorball, a stage, and a bar. All the tables had 'reserved' signs on them, and man did my feet hurt from standing the whole time, but the music was awesome. Afterward, we hung around outside on the street while the band packed up (we were parked right behind them) and waited for the meter to expire, because, you know, gotta get your money's worth out of those parking meters, LOL. Mostly it was just the people we rode with and a few other ladies from the convention kinda talking with band and with Rob, and my friend and I kinda hung on the outskirts, since we don't really do the fangirling thing, but just as we were about to get into the car, Rob came over and gave us both a big hug and thanked us profusely for coming all the way out there to see him. At which point, of course, I told him it was worth it and that I really enjoyed it. I was a little surprised he did that, since I wasn't even sure he knew we were there to see him, but I guess he saw us getting into the car with our friends and put two and two together that we came from the convention.

Anyway, I couldn't buy any of their CDs or t-shirts or anything, because I had absolutely no room in my bag for one more thing. However, when I got home, I hunted down their website and found out you can get all the CDs, a t-shirt, and an autographed picture for 50 dollars. I'd say it's totally worth it, and their most recent CD is streaming on the website if you want to sample before you buy.

Here's the link:

If nothing else, the lyrics should make you smile.

And this has been my public service announcement. That and, get your flu shots, childrens.


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